Crystal
Patient
Last on 5 days ago
2001 points.
Silver Ninja

Crystal's Journal

Results 1 - 5
  • April 17, 2010

    What is wrong with me, someone please...

     Here is the deal. I had my lap done a few weeks ago due to my pain. OKAY there are a few things I will remind you, or let you know before I tell the full story. First , I WAS diagnosed by lap in 2006 with endo. I had been seeing the same dr, then I switched because when the pain started coming back, I started getting the run around. 

    I switched Dr's and ended up having to be out of work for a second surgery in March of 2010. But before my surgery , ON MY FIRST appointment with the dr I told her that I wanted to be tested for fibromyalgia, b/c I have noticed that a lot of endo patients, have Fibromyalgia as well. She told me to be tested for that I would need to see a neurologist. Now being that I don't know much on Fibromyalgia, I didn't worry about that. Here is the thing, They did my lap, I had a VERY VERY VERY small cyst, and NO ENDO. so I am wondering now, what is wrong. I will go over my symptoms in a moment, first I did want to let you know that, when I went in for my follow up appointment , they took my IUD out, which is great, this way I could try for  baby . Now I started having bleeding yesterday, very heavy. So I thought okay I got my period, well the pain was on my left side, and when I went in Tuesday for my follow up, and to have the IUD out, I had told her that I thought there might be a cyst on my left side, b/c I had the same pain as the cyst I had removed on my right side. Now when I called the dr they said they can give me vicodin, BUT I NEED to see a pain specialtist, I called the pain specialist who isn't available until September. Now here is the issue with that, I am working and I cant afford to loose my job. even though I am in pain, NO ONE WILL SIGN ada papers, and NO one will sign Short term disability papers, because my reg dr wont sign since she refered me to this dr, and that dr wont sign b/c they haven't seen me yet. so I found out there is another dr available in may, i asked what they will do. My dr had said they would try to find if something else is causing the pain, The office of this pain specialist said they will do a lap to see if I have ENDO. so why the hell are they doing this if my dr just did this.they have another dr, available next month but here is the other thing. 
    the fibromyalgia issue; I did some research today on webmd.com and it shows it is HIGHLY likely I have this, and it says on line that you get painful periods with it, so while in the past I have had endo, this time I dont. Also I read a lot of patients with endo have fibromyalgia as well. So here are my symptoms, I tell my family all the time, my aches feel like the flu , with out the cold. Painful periods, random twitches through out my body, I cant consentrate b/c of the pain, and I cant even do house work, or excersise with out pain or fatigue, I have a lot of issues with bowels, and frequent urgency to urinate.I have a lot of sleep issues, fatigue, and anxiety.Basically,  This is what I found on web md, and I have all these.
    • Pain
    • Anxiety
    • Concentration and memory problems -- known as "fibro fog"
    • Depression
    • Fatigue
    • Headaches
    • Irritable bowel syndrome
    • Morning stiffness
    • Painful menstrual cramps
    • Sleep problems
    • Swelling, numbness, and tingling in hands, arms, feet, and legs
    • Tender points
    • Urinary symptoms
    I read this list to my mom, and she said, WOW that just described you. SO I am thinking MAYBE, this is what it is. And these are symptoms I have always had , so its not like I look at the symptoms, and add to the list. 

     I scheduled and Appointment with a neurologist, to be tested. I just wanted some advice or opinions> Anyone?
  • April 07, 2010

    Questions about endo

    originally posted on blogger

     So there have been somethings on my mind lately . I really haven't talked about the issues too much, because no one has really asked me about them. With this recent surgery, everyone has asked me if I am doing okay, and wishing me well. I have gotten offers to help me out. The thing that I haven't talked about is how worried I am. Part of the endo couldn't be removed, and they sent some of the tissue from the cyst for testing. The cyst was not big, but it was deep. This scares me. I have never really been scared about this disease, but now I am but it almost wishes they could find something wrong, so I know I am NOT crazy.. Yes I have endo, but not that much. Not even enough at this point to be a stage one. I had the surgery , still in TONS of pain.. .and since no one can see this blog unless they want to lets get into some more personal issues regarding sex, IF YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW. OR IF YOU ARE GOING TO COMPLAIN THAT THIS IS POSTED PUBLICLY , TURN AWAY, BECAUSE I HAVE FRIENDS WITH ENDO WHO MIGHT NOT MENTION THIS, OR MIGHT HAVE AN ANSWER FOR ME. 

      SEX with ENDO. Please let me know if you have the same issue. Okay most of us know that with endo we and sex there is pain. But does any one else have a ton of pain, just by getting turned on. If you are sitting in front of your computer raising your hand, put it down. there is no one there and I would like to know. I am in more pain just by getting turned on than sex alone. And it really sucks, because I have to get some satisfaction to get rid of the pain, The sex alone doesn't hurt, its odd, if I get turned on, I have to have sex to get rid of the pain, but if the out come of sex leads to an orgasm, more pain. Why is that? Please if you have endo, answer this for me, or at least let me know if you have the issue too. 
      
        Another thing, what if the cyst shows signs of cancer. I am also wondering if since there was some endo the dr couldn't get to, will the dr sign my ADA paper work. All this is confussing and really stressing me out. You know what makes me feel better in these times, yes its superficial, but a nice gester from the fiance, but I never would ask because he does too much for me, which leads to my next part of my problems. 

      Sometimes these emotions are all too much for me. I hate it. Steven does so much for me, that I look past a lot of issues we have, I just let them roll by, but then it makes me wonder what I might let him get away with. Steven is definately my soul mate, but he does all the work, and my mixed emotions cause us to almost loose what we have worked so hard for, and the moment I ask him to do something, that he takes a little longer on, I  freak out, and then I am disapointed. 

      At this point in my life I feel lost, and I have no idea where to go. I am trapped with this disease and hopint to change things. It is ruining my life, and my family, and possibly the chances of a future family. I am hurt by stuff that hasn't happent. Nightmares of my family falling apart. Sleepless nights from pain medications that make me want to talk constantly. Me starting arguements with my fiance about things that never happened, and thinking he is going to leave me. I get pissed when he doesnt' ask  how my day is, and the moment I finally sleep, I wake up with a nightmare of him leaving. 
      
         So this is my plea to you. IF you have any advice or this disease, please drop me a line. Please let me know what you are feeling and give me some hope that I am not the only one experiencing all this. I see it on facebook all the time on status messages, and  a few times on comments on my blogs on facebook. Please let me know your feelings. 
  • April 04, 2010

    Help

    , hEndo sisters, 

    I thought I would take sometime to talk on here as I am really distraught. too much family and close friends on facebook and myspace. You all know the fiance I rant and rave about on here ,about how wonderful he is, and how great he is to take care of me, and wait on me. Well, I guess he isn't that perfect. I recently found out that 8 months ago, he cheated. He says it didn't last long, he was in the girl for about 5 seconds before saying I cant do this. I feel so stupid for thinking he was perfect, but I don't want to give up. I am looking to see if anyone has been through this, and still stayed in that relationship, and if it worked out. I am really hurt, and this all came out while I was recovering from my lap surgery. I am not ready to give up on us, as even though 5 seconds is way too long to realize you are Fucking up, I just want to move on from this. I feel that if a relationship that is perfect everywhere else,  then something as stupid as sex shouldn't get in the way. Any ideas. 
  • March 29, 2010

    Surgery

    So its time for yet another chapter of endo in my life. Today I had my surgery again. This time, there wasn't much there so at least my IUD is helping some, however, they did find some endo on my rectum, and some on my ovary. I don't know too much about it, because I haven't talked to the dr yet, the info I got was from my bf. They told him, the endo by my rectum is so little, to try and remove, because it could cause more damage than it is worth, They told my bf that the only thing that can help right now is to go on depo lupron. I don't mind going on that, however I want to have another child. So as you can see its going to be a hard choice. I will keep you all more informed after my dr apt in a few weeks.

  • March 06, 2010

    WOW, fantastic new doctor!

    Okay, so I had a dr apt, yesterday, to see about having my IUD out. Well last week, I was in the ER, with yet another cyst so I have been out of work, since then. When I went in to the dr today, I told her I wanted to see about having another lap done, as my first one, went VERY well, I got prego with my daughter right after, and have had no issues, until recently. I want to have more children, soon, and decided this was best. She wants to find out what is going on, and FIX it , or treat it as best as she can, before a pregnancy, b/c she doesnt want me to have a hard pregnancy. SO, my surgery will be sometime NEXT week. YAY.